When I Struggle

I was sharing my testimony with a friend the other day and at the end of sharing my story, full of joy and sorrow, I summed it up by saying

“Yeah, this has been a hard life, but Jesus is worth it.”

She looked at me curiously and asked, “When did you decide that Jesus was worth it for you?” This question was one I hadn’t thought of. When had I decided Jesus was worth it?

I concluded that I decided Jesus was worth it when I was seven years old and I asked Him into my heart. At that young age, I decided Jesus was worth it based on a very limited understanding of Jesus and the hardships life can often times offer you. But each valley and sorrow has had the potential to make me question if Jesus TRULY is worth it. Looking back at these short nineteen years of life, I have decided Jesus is worth it. Not because I blindly trust a man with long flowing hair who lived thousands of years ago. I believe Jesus is worth it because He has proven it to me. Deciding Jesus is worth it didn’t just happen once, but it is a decision I make daily. It is a decision I make even when the hardest of times approach.

When I struggled with severe anxiety, I knew Jesus was worth it because of the overwhelming peace He offers.

When I struggled with my first break up, I knew Jesus was worth it because of the unconditional, sacrificial love that He freely wraps us up in.

While I’m still sick, I know Jesus is worth it because He is using this sickness to share His gospel while expanding His kingdom.

When life doesn’t unfold the way I hoped, Jesus is worth it because He is author of my story who hasn’t let me down this far.

I am not saying that trials are easy.

They are not and I will be the first person to tell you that. But I can promise you that the Lord will not lead you to something and abandon you. He may very well lead you to something you can’t handle alone, but that’s the most beautiful thing. He will lead you into something, challenging you to face that trial with Him. He is leading you into a growing relationship with Himself by promoting you to release the reigns and allow Him to take over. He is a faithful Father who does everything for our good and for His glory. Every struggle I have encountered has been another reason to me why Jesus is worth it. He is worth it simply because of who He is. He is worth it because of His character, His unchanging grace, His joy, His unshakeable love.

God is the best guide, follow Him wherever He leads. Follow Him no matter the circumstance. I can promise you one thing, He is a loving Father who fights for His children.